Wednesday, December 20, 2006

i sized you up the moment we met

best. bond. movie. ever.

ok...i need to rail on two subjects...likely briefly, but i don't know which to start with. i tell you what...i'll flip my tazo cap--creepy psuedo-eastern rendering of thier product name and i start with the new bond girl...wannabe buddhist, and compact, version of their product name and i start with the rice krispies commercial. krispies it is. you know what...screw kismet...this works better if i start w/bond.

everyone has seen the new bond, right? holy crap! right?! not only was it my favorite bond movie, it featured my favorite bond girl. easily. by a million miles. like, no contest. at al.

drop dead gorgeous. dangerous brilliant (maybe even smarter than me?!) sarcastic right up to the point of being caustic, but soft just in time. delicate but strong. willing to attack someone and aid in their death, but human enough to be freaked out by it. also, drop dead gorgeous. right down to those awesome freckles. 

she was the only bond girl ever who i would believe could conquer bond. she conquered me, and i have yet to meet her. i, too, have no armor left.

ok...commercial making is an art. you have 30-45 seconds to win over an audience who doesn't want to be your audience. commercials get better all the time. there are a few companies that have been making wonderful little movies for some time now (i.e. delta), some have been making good comedy (largely the beer companies) but it seems to me that most of them are just now catching on. companies, especially auto makers, have started pulling from the best of modern folk and indie rock (there have been more than a few songs from this blog that have shown up in car adds.) [see royskopp for geico...ratatat for hummer to name a couple.] the first time i remember this happening (though i know that it happened plenty of times before it) was when the postal service showed up on an(i think) ipod add, back when ipods were brand new. this was when i was the only person i know of who knew of TPS. some indie folks get pretty bent out of shape over this "commercialization" of their preferred art form. personally, i like it that the bands can put food on their tables, without which, they might abandon the band and stop making great art.


i love kids. i want kids. i don't need a lecture about rushing in to these things (if anyone knows that you can spend years w/someone before realizing that you are completely incompatible, it's me.) well, the first time in my life that i have ever felt legitimately bummed that i'm not a dad yet happened like two hours ago. stupid rice krispies. the best i can do to show you the commercial is to send you to, which plays the add, but not in as good quality as i would like. (this is another one from the same series, with the same song, but it isn't nearly as bad.) below is the song, which i will talk about in a second.

i'm running out of steam on this, but suffice it to say, those girls are so cute and i can't wait to have kids of my own. i've never felt my spinsterism so acutely as now. being lonely doesn't do it nearly as much as the sadness over the possibility of never having kids of my own does.

stupid rice krispies.

side note: the cereal is marketed on the basis of the noises it produces when milk is added to the bowl. the onomatopoeic noises differ by language:
  • English: "Snap! Crackle! Pop!"
  • Finnish: "Riks! Raks! Poks!"
  • French: "Cric! Crac! Croc!"
  • German: "Knisper! Knasper! Knusper!"
  • Swedish: "Piff! Paff! Puff!"
  • Spanish: "Pim! Pum! Pam!"
  • Romanian: "Kim! Kan! Kum!"

so, here is where the two combine. i'm looking for a vesper lynd to have children with. is it so hard to find a girl who is model beautiful with a genius level brain. what is so unreasonable and difficult about that? if she is independently wealthy and wants to take me on trips around the world, all the better. why don't more of these women exist, and why haven't i impregnated any of them? or are all the smart, beautiful ones cheaters (i've never met one who hasn't cheated)? and, if so, what does that say about monogamy?

Israel Kamakawiwo'oleSomewhere Over the Rainbow/What a Wonderful World.

from dismal talk to beautiful and full of love.

i have heard this song at three of the last four weddings i have been to. one couple walked to it. it is that pretty. seriously.

those of you who use itunes are shit out of luck as the file is .wma.

i'll be in sonoma tonight, spreading some love northward.